I almost lost my f****ng mind.
Hi sorry, excuse me – it’s Palmer!
I sometimes lose my mind a bit, especially if I’m tired or frustrated. No, this isn’t about sleep habits (maybe another time), but rather the not-so-secret secret of staying committed to living our most intentional, vibrant lives.
There I was at 11:30 pm on a Friday, ready for my longest sleep in seven weeks. Exhausted but grateful, I drifted off until my wife shook me awake. BEEP!…60 seconds…BEEP! The smoke alarm was going off. Of course, this happened to me. Just my luck. I quickly spiraled into a dramatic self-pity, wondering how I could be dealt such a bad hand and imagining myself shattering the smoke alarm once I got my hands on it. Despite knowing my postpartum superhero wife was waking up constantly to nurse every day and night, recovering from pregnancy, and getting bad sleep, changing those batteries felt unfair.
As I tried to desperately rationalize this unfair situation, suddenly my rational brain kicked in, flooding me with clarity from years of practicing shifting my perspective. I realized my thoughts were preposterous and guided myself back toward gratitude and peace.
I had two choices: stay stuck in frustration or redirect my mind toward the person I want to be. For years, negative moments like these derailed me for hours or even days. I used to think acknowledging every emotion was important, but most negative thoughts don’t hold lasting value and simply need to be put to rest. Otherwise, my mood and day become dictated by external chaos.
When I commit to grounding myself in gratitude, I always come out better. I work on this with all my clients and see many adults (myself included) let small frustrations derail how we show up for ourselves, our kids, and our spouses. Even minor negative thoughts pull us away from gratitude, peace, and connection.
So here’s my encouragement: don’t expect yourself never to feel frustration, whether it’s a smoke alarm at 3 am, someone cutting you off, your kid talking back, or your spouse doing that one thing again. Instead, work to acknowledge these disconnecting thoughts quickly and redirect them toward gratitude and connection. Life will always have its challenges, but a grateful heart moves you closer to a headspace you truly feel good about. Every moment is precious, and I want us only to let anxiety and frustration have the bare minimum amount of time it takes for us to realize what’s happening in our thoughts.
I am grateful to be able to write this email, and I am grateful your family has you (no matter how often you end up in banana town alongside me)!
Have a wonderful day and find those thoughts to help only lose your marbles for a few moments!
Kerry and Palmer 🙂
